I spotted Kim Director in an episode of Sex and the City yesterday, and it got me thinking about how much I loved her in Blair Witch 2: Book of Shadows (2000). During the weird transitional phase between Vox folding and me starting a new blog here at WordPress, I was actually working on a very long post about that movie… but it was getting so bitchy and ranty, that I had to delete it for fear of the stain it might leave on my soul. Even now I can feel the bile bubbling up inside me… so, let’s try to shorthand it, shall we? BW2:BoS is, in my humble opinion, the WORST SEQUEL EVER MADE. Not necessarily because it’s a bad movie in itself (it would be impossible for me to judge that objectively at this point), but because it actively seeks to deride and diminish its predecessor. Obviously The Blair Witch Project isn’t perfect… and it certainly isn’t sacrosanct… but regardless of co-writer/director’s Joe Berlinger’s defensive, disingenuous protests to the contrary, it’s pretty obvious that the dude has some serious issues with the first flick’s success. He seems to view the sequel as his forum to “comment” on everything he thinks was wrong with BWP, and in doing so, he implies that anyone who enjoyed it is probably an idiot at best, and a potential killer at worst. It’s one thing to disappoint an established audience, and quite another to insult them at their own expense! I’m just glad I picked it up second-hand, ten years after the fact, because if I’d paid real money to see it, I’d be even angrier right now.
[Deep, cleansing breath…]
All of that aside, the movie’s one redeeming feature (aside from the kick-ass soundtrack album) is Director’s performance as ‘Kim’. Apparently she auditioned for a different role, but Berlinger was smart enough to recognise that her striking features and piercing blue peepers would serve her much better as the tour group’s token Goth. It’s not just her appearance that catches your attention, of course… she really embraces the archetype, and brings a lot of deadpan humour and attitude to the role. Just seeing her schlepping supplies around while gripping a defiant cigarette between her teeth made me chuckle far more than it should. If she had appeared in any other movie, ‘Kim’ might well have become one of my fave fictional Goths of all time… but I’ll always think fondly of those first few “getting to know you” scenes, before the story kicks in and everything goes to hell in a hanging basket… I mean, how can you not love a gal who’s first introduced taking a casual catnap on a gravestone? Bless her.